I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
