I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
it hurts more in the daytime
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
