Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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