Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
