Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
