I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Randomize
