If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
