the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
