He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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