Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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