I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
Farmville is her only friend.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
how does that bad decision feel?
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
