last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
