"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
