Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
