but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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