Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Randomize
