Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Randomize
