I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Randomize
