got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
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