He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Randomize
