Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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