i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
barbara walters just said penis...
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
