And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
that's an acceptable place to lick
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
