I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
