I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
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