I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
