You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
