awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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