There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
The uberlube is also flammable
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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