I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
