2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
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