the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
