Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
