Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
There's even glitter on my cock...
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