Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
