It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
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