What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
i think my mom watched the whole time
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
