Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
