Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
