I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Randomize
