eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I don't think brook has ever known best
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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