Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
