when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
wow bdsm is so cute
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
