My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
