that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
what day is it and did you see me today?
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
