So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
