can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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