I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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