put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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