I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
